I am sitting here in complete silence this cold, icy morning. Silence doesn’t usual occur here, but when it does, I usually have a heart wrenching moment. The New Farmer and Mini Farmer #1 are at church and I’m home with the rest of the gang. And it happened……..3 children napping at the same time…….a very rare moment indeed.
My list of things I wanted to accomplish during this spontaneous event was large. I am a list maker…an obsessive list maker. Like……I’m mentally making a list as I’m typing this post….but I rarely mark things off my list because, well…..life happens.
As I stood looking at my list, I felt a tugging…..I usually ignore that nagging, tugging feeling. But, today I can’t. It’s so dang cold here…..inside and out. Our first pond is literally an ice skating rink for the geese visiting. Everything looks so insanely frozen. And inside, it’s chilly. The heaters here are overworked and The New Farmer didn’t get a cozy fire going before he left……brrrrrrr
So….as I mentioned I’m sitting here in quietness….and coldness….with a heart tugging. There’s something I feel I need to write to mamas like me. Because I’m having a “moment”.
You see……I don’t like the house being
I despise being cranky. But….it happens…..and right now my house is messy….and during this rare “all kids napping” moment, I really want to clean this place up. But as I sit here in cold, quiet, messy aloneness…..I realized I need to
I scurry around the house all day picking up messes…..and I am missing some very precious moments with my children. This….is….heartbreaking.
Our children need more of us…..because later in life, the one thing they’ll want and wish they had more of from their parents, is
They….are….gone. I want my children to look back and say how much fun their mama was……but instead, they may say their mama cleaned, organized, and the house was picked up nicely. My gosh……I have missed special moments.
I have made precious memories, spent time snuggling, teaching, caring, and playing with my babies. But I’ve realized I’ve missed a lot too.
So, dear mama’s like me, I know the mess and chaos can feel overwhelming. I see it every day. And as hard as it is to let that mess sit there, I have to let it sit because the days go by so quickly. And honestly, my kids love to help so we can pick up the messes together when the timing is right. One day this house will only hold me and The New Farmer. The quiet, icy days with me sitting and gazing at the ice skating geese will outnumber the messy days we’ve had here. And hopefully, while I sit in those moments, I’ll look back with no regrets…..and fill my heart with all the fun memories we’ve created.